How long have you lived in Las Vegas?

With the exception of some time in Utah and California and my time abroad in Europe, 25 years. I’m a native.

When did you know you were gay?

When I was 5 years old I watched The Never Ending Story. I had a huge crush on Atreyu, the kid with the horse. I guess I didn’t know what it was called back then, but once I hit puberty I realized that’s what they called it “being gay”.

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What is one of the most difficult challenges being gay and Mormon?

The guilt. Mormon theology places great emphasis on what they call eternal marriage. In order to achieve the highest degree of glory one must be sealed to their spouse in the temple. Same-sex marriages are not allowed, so right off the bat, gay people are set up below their straight counterparts. Also, the paradigm of “Hellfire and Brimstone” as a punishment for sin caused a great deal of fear. Because homosexual acts are sins in the eyes of the Church, I experienced a tremendous amount of guilt growing up simply for my attraction to males.

What advice would you give someone who is struggling with being gay and Mormon?

For someone who is questioning whether or not to stay in the church or get out, my answer is emphatically this: get out and learn that God loves you just the way you are. Unless you plan to live a life of celibacy, you will never have full standing in the church. Even if you did remain celibate, without a wife and a family, you’re really not “one of them” in a purely cultural sense. For those who absolutely are determined to remain active in the church, I understand that there is a great need to be part of the family, part of the ward, part of “God’s Family” and “God’s Church”. I get it. But be aware that this is a long and lonely road. It is filled with self-loathing and is plagued with guilt. I do not recommend it. But no matter how bad it gets, please do not take your own life, as so many gay Mormons have done. There is plenty of love and acceptance out there waiting for you to accept. Please know that you are loved.